The world has arrived on your doorstep. Every kid from every beachbreak town from every other country wants a photo at your local break, and on top of that, every two-bit networking industry clown, hack blogger and cameraman has decided to paddle out as well.

This year, Hawaiian locals -- in a bid to rid themselves of the great white plague congesting their breaks -- decided to unleash a secret weapon ... this woman

Each morning, around 9am, she canters along the stretch between Off-The-Wall and Rockys and something miraculous happens.

Blowhards shut up and dribble all over themselves, no one paddles for waves, people get washed in by clean-up sets and flop about in the shorebreak, hypnotised.

There's usually a further hour of recovery, people walking into poles, making crabholes, rubbing themselves against the pylons on the lifeguard tower.